The boundaries I’ve struggled with the most are with my inner critic boundaries.
I’ve said cruel things to myself that I’d never imagine saying to anyone else.
And I used to think that it was normal. Everyone has an inner critic. No big deal.
But it is a big deal because it has a significant impact on my mental health.
So if you’re normalizing being cruel to yourself, STOP IT! This is slowing you down from fulfilling the life task you’re meant to complete.
And when you’re that cruel to yourself, you allow yourself to be cruel to other ppl too. You might not say it out loud but you’ll say it all in one look, one silent treatment, one huff. The change the starts with you.
How to Set Inner Critic Boundaries:
1. Put a Hand on Your Heart
Your inner critic is acting out because there is a young part of you that’s scared or angry or upset. So put a hand on your heart to acknowledge that young part of yourself.
2. Acknowledge the Emotion
Say something like:
“You get to be scared for as long as you need to be scared.”
Or “You get to be angry for as long as you need to be angry.”
3. Set Loving Boundaries
Then say “but you don’t get to call me names and you don’t get to be cruel to me.”
After you set the boundary, the young part of you might need more love or support.
This Wednesday I’m going to send a newsletter on how to easily do this inner child work, so make sure if you’re signed up if you wanna learn more about that. Sign up: Somatics, Spirituality and Feminism Newsletter
If you’re being cruel to yourself… STOP IT. I’m taking a stand for your tender heart!
PS If you want to join the FREE WORKSHOP on Somatics for Healthy Boundaries, which teaches boundary setting work for both yourself and with your clients, join here: Somatics for Healthy Boundaries Workshop!
PSS Toronto Coaches, Therapists & Healers: the Somatic Inner Child Workshop is coming up Saturday June 3rd. Join Pablo and I here!