Allowing for Ease

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When I was 22, I had fallen in love with a boy who lived in Newfoundland. I’ll call him K. We had met the year before on my school’s reading week when I’d driven half way across the country through snow storms for the sake of an adventure. Upon meeting him, K. had blown me away. He was interested in photography and art, had his own dark room in a closet at his house. He tasted like freedom.

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Friends, I made a mistake.

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I launched a course called the Month of Courage and a few weeks after, I didn’t feel good about it.

Sometimes I set the date and that helps me to get my butt in gear to produce. But this time, that didn’t happen. This time, when I thought about working on the course, it felt like a heavy burden. This time, it was bad.

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Overcoming Worthlessness

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I have struggled with worthlessness for as long as I can remember. As a little girl I believed I only had worth if I got good marks, was packed and ready to go on time, if I did the dishes and looked pretty. I used every external marker to give myself worth. If I got a B or was late, I felt terrible. My breath would get fast, my chest would get tight and I would beat myself up.

And now, as an adult, I still fall into these patterns. I rush to the meeting, obsess over my work and beat myself up if I notice a stain on my clothes or if I forget a small detail.

And the thing about worthlessness, is I often don’t realize how it’s influencing my decisions and controlling my life.

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Courage Compass Podcast: After the Fire with Swami Lalitananda

screen-shot-2017-01-01-at-10-10-43-amHow can the teachings of yoga help us to live a life filled with courage?

Swami Lalitananda had been appointed as president of Yasodhara Ashram, a yoga retreat and study centre, mere weeks before the community’s most beloved building, the Temple of Light, was destroyed in a fire. In this episode she talks about how the teachings helped the community move through this event and how these teachings can help us bring courage into the workplace, into our relationships and into our everyday life.

Listen to this episode.

Courage Compass: Most Popular Articles of 2016

Based on which articles I have loved and which ones have been viewed the most, I’ve curated the top five articles of 2016. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I have enjoyed writing them!

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Set Your Direction for 2017

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For the past 10 months I have been working on the Courage Compass, a life coaching business and it’s been one of the most challenging things that I’ve done.

The main hurdle for me has been: Am I ready for this? Do I have the necessary skills? Will I offer a quality product? Do I know what I’m doing? Am I a complete fraud?

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Lead with your Pleasure

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For me, pleasure has always been a dirty word. Something to stamp out. Growing up I was taught bad girls like pleasure and that I was a good girl.

And pleasure was always tangled up with sex. And since sex was associated with shame, pleasure always seemed like a shameful thing.

So I avoided it. I ran away from pleasure. I tried to be “a good person” but I ended up just being “a tired person.” Someone who worked hard and then snapped at the people I loved. Someone who beat myself up for the mistakes I made. And someone who wore my hard work as a badge of honour. “I am such a hard worker,” I thought, “and that’s why I’m so tired and grumpy.” And about others I thought, “If you aren’t as grumpy or stressed as me that means you aren’t working hard enough.”

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