Tossing and turning, back and forth: making big decisions


A couple of years ago I started looking at one bedrooms, bachelors and studios to rent.  I am moving out on my own. As I scrolled through Craigslist and Padmapper looking at prices, pictures, areas of town, my chest felt tight.  I started to panic. Could I really afford to live in this city? Could I really afford to move out on my own?  Maybe I should move somewhere else.  I called my dad and talked through the idea of moving to Thunder Bay. What were the pros, the cons.  I ended the phone call by deciding to sleep on it.

One day after a dance workshop, I biked to High Park to spend sometime in nature on my own.  On the way there, I turned off a side street to look at some of the apartment buildings near by.  I took pictures with my phone of addresses and phone numbers.  Somehow being in the actual space allowed me to move away from a place of panic about moving to one of curiosity and calm.  I examined the different buildings, considered my options.  When I got home I looked them up online.

I went back a couple of days later to see if I could see some of the units.  I found a beautiful studio with a stunning view of the lake.  I fell in the love with the place but tossed and turned about the price tag.  I had come to terms with spending 40% of my take home income on housing, but this place had blown through my budget.

The panic started again when I went to see a similar unit nearby but in a different complex.  Many parts of it were comparable, but the price was lower.  I still loved the tiny and beautiful place I had found but wouldn’t it be the responsible thing to take this other unit.  It wasn’t as nice but was more reasonable.

After tossing and turning, back and forth, talking to family and friends about the decision, I’m going forward with the more expensive place.  I love it and it will be where I spend every day of my year.

I also know that if after a couple of months if the financial burden feels too hard to bear, I can assign my lease to someone else. Or I can move out after the one year lease.  I know that this is an experiment and that even if it is the wrong decision, I will learn from it and I will learn to pivot.

And I’m also incredibly excited about this small and beautiful space. I move in July 1st!

Do you want to:

  • Make decisions easily?
  • Stop feeling so drained?
  • Have more time for what you love?

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Take care of yourself!!

Bryn Bamber
Career Burnout Coach
The Courage Compass


Author: Bryn Bamber

Career Coach Bryn Bamber helps people like you find a career that’s aligned with your goals. Her Burnout to Brilliance program teaches you how to make small shifts that will free up tons of energy for the things you really love. Start today with your FREE Checklist: Decrease Stress and Get an Hour of Your Day Back! Get it here - Learn more about Bryn & the Burnout to Brilliance program at

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