Easter Sunday and I eat a delicious brunch, chat with some old friends and some new ones and then spend some time alone on the porch with a couple of books and my journal. I go to the garden blessing but skip out on the Easter hike.
I love holidays at Yasodhara Ashram and I’m beginning to realize it’s because there’s this beautiful coming together as a community but there’s also space for me to do my own thing. There’s space for balance and I’m invited to create a balance that works for me.
This year at Christmas I started my morning with a walk on the beach alone and then made my way to the main building for an incredible brunch. It was my first Christmas away from my family and it was really beautiful. I spent most of the day with the community but the morning and the evening alone. And it was exactly what I needed, by 7 pm all I wanted to do was cuddle up and read my book and there was no social pressure to do otherwise.
A lot of what we work on here is supporting each other to move towards emotional independence, and so when I told a friend I was skipping out on the Easter hike she smiled and told me to have a good time. I felt supported to do what I needed to do and so I did. And there’s a beautiful calmness and a feeling of great power that comes from being able to give myself what I need.
Slowly, I am learning to bring balance to my life, and with this balance I am beginning to become whole.