Three years ago, my boyfriend of 4.5 months broke up with me. And so it was a process of untangling our lives and letting go.
After a couple of weeks of not talking to him and crying a lot, the crying stopped and I slipped back into talking, texting with him.
A lot.
And I’m not at all against staying friends after breaking up, but there’s something about what we were doing that’s like we’re still dating just without the sex. Wanting to know how many goals he scored at soccer last night, wanting to know how his Friday is going, wanting to know.
And I realized I needed to make space in my life. I needed to resist the urge to send him every funny video I watch, every article that may “help him”, every thought that passes through my mind. There’s a difference between staying friends and staying tangled.
And so I resisted – I didn’t send him “35 things you should do for your career by the time your turn 35” or text him to ask when are we finally going to go to see Straight Outta Compton. I resisted.
And I made space in my mind and in my life.
And it’s scary to make space because who knows what will fill it.
But what I do know,
is that if you don’t make space,
then there won’t be room
for something else.
Make space in your life for something better, more beautiful, more peaceful.
And take good care of yourself. You deserve rest and rejuvenation.
DO YOU:
- feel like at the end of the day you have nothing left to give
- feel more sensitive than usual to the little things that come up
- feel like you’ve taken on too much and aren’t certain if it’s all really aligned with your purpose
This checklist will show you the steps to feel lighter, a sense of accomplishment and get an hour of your day back by saying no to what you don’t need and making space for something better.
You in?
Yes, GIVE ME THE BLUEPRINT TO MAKE SPACE!
Talk soon,
Bryn
—
Bryn Bamber
Career Burnout Coach
Burnout to Brilliance
www.brynbamber.com
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
― Howard Thurman
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Oouff… This resonates really strongly with me. I’ve been peering over the edge of that cliff for many weeks on a couple of big fronts — one old and deep and painful but familiar, the other newer and pleasurable but not conducive to what my soul knows is the next phase of my journey… And I’ve found myself alternately backing up to give myself a running start, and convincing myself that I needn’t take the leap after all.
With the way your words hit me, I’m not sure I’ll be able to deny the truth much longer… Though what it will take for me to gather the courage is another question.
Familiar knowns are so comfortable, even when we know them to be limiting… What does it take for the unconscious to come to know what the conscious mind can deduce clearly? Experience, it seems to me, which can only be gained having taken the step…
And then there is faith.
Thanks for the note! Glad to hear it resonated with you.
And all the best with your next step :)!
Bryn
I feel the exact same way! My ex was my closest friend as well, making it really hard to resist, but it ultimately is the best and only option in an attempt to move on 🙂
I like how you have put them into words! I’ve written few poems about love and break ups. I hope you get to read them and tell me what you think. English is not my language but I aim to be better at writing in english 🙂