As you’ve probably seen, I launched a career coaching program called Pathway to Your Purpose. I made a program webpage, a registration form, set the prices and dates, wrote blog posts, made social media flyers, did a Facebook Live and Linked everything In.
I pushed and pushed and pushed.
I got some comments, some interest, some people considering the program. Some encouragement but no registrations. I passed all of the deadlines and nothing. Nobody. A zero dollar launch.
When a friend comes to me because they’re upset about something I did, I want to say the right thing. So I think and think and analyze the facts. How can I take responsibility for what happened? How can I be mature about this situation? How can I address this in a way that makes my friend feel heard?
I am trying to be perfect. The perfect friend, daughter, sister, employee, partner. And so I want to say the perfect thing.
But I’m realizing, when I try to say the perfect thing, I sacrifice saying the true thing. And by focusing only on the other person’s experience, I give up myself.
I sit in front of my computer screen. I stare at the blank word document. I check Facebook. I check my email. I scroll through twitter until I make my way to tweets I’ve already read.
I go back to the word document. My stomach sinks. Where do I start? How can I do this? My palms sweat. I go back to Facebook and watch a video of a cute hedgehog eating food that my friend has posted. I feel better. I look for more cute videos to watch.
“I don’t know how to answer. I wish there was something to reveal, some horrible secret about my childhood so we would have our explanation and they could feel sorry for me. I wish someone had hurt me so I could say, This is why. But I’ve never had an excuse for being me.”
I’ve gotten obsessed with cue cards recently, and so when my designer (who is also my sister) did this beautiful drawing of a heart for my website, I thought it would be fun to write down some of my thoughts on courage in a small and beautiful cue card format. Enjoy the beginning of our collection!
Ahhh! It’s so terrifying to post this on the internet. But it is the truth.
I am writing a book!
This all came about because, as many of you know, for two years I wrote a 108 poems in the fall to raise money for the Young Adult Program at Yasodhara Ashram, which means I have over 200 poems written on all different kinds of topics.
The Intuitive Warrior,
Strong and Fierce.
Hears the call and prepares for battle,
She knows that this is a war that must be fought,
That her work will not be in vain.
Her hips are wide,
She oils her leather armour with love,
Singing softly to herself.
When you look her in the eyes you see,
The intensity of her fierce heart,
The fire of her passion,
And the depth of her love.
Her children know that she is fierce,
And that she loves them fiercely.
But their fear is little,
Compared to the fear of her opponent.
Fighting her on the ground is like,
Fighting a tornado.
As she leaps and spins,
A whirling mass of kicking legs and sharp elbows.
She will only stab you once,
And it will be in the heart.
She wields her dagger with precision and grace,
And there is no more suffering than is necessary.
For she knows her work is sacred,
Not to be done carelessly but with honour for the opponent and the task.
I am this warrior of the heart,
The most fierce variety because I know that my convictions are true and that justice must be served.
There is no stopping courage that comes from the heart.